Monday, October 5, 2009

The Motherly Bond

I find it interesting the variety of views from mothers of impressions they want to make upon their children.  Some believe to be a good mother, one must strictly breast feed (no bottles).  Or some believe that to be a good mother, one must always choose what their pediatrician advises (hello mothers, we have a choice!)  Others believe that to be a good mother, one must be fruitful and multiply while some believe less is better.  Quality vs. quantity or stay at home mothers vs. career mothers?  Pacifiers or no pacifiers?  Play groups or no play groups?  Babysitters or no babysitters?  The ideas and perceptions are endless.

What I want to know is...what is so difficult about being the best mother you believe you can be to your children AND have a different view about what is the best for your children than other moms?    Mothers are too judgemental on one another.  But why?  Sometimes I think that the source or root of most judgements are based on personal insecurities.  "That mother doesn't vaccinate their child, she is NOT a good mother."  Well maybe the woman judging secretly worries about vaccine safety.  What is so difficult about NOT judging and respecting other's choices?  After all, how many mothers do YOU know that wish to not give their children everything in the world or wish to make choices that negatively affect their children's lives?  For me, none.  Do I judge for the differences in parenting?  To be honest...sometimes.  But I force myself to quickly reconnect with reality.  Everyone's views are different.  Reality is that most families cannot survive with only one income or some supermommies have no choice because they ARE the only parents! 

We as women have survived hundreds of thousands of years supporting one another and caring for one another's offspring.  There was no such thing as one mom, one dad and their babies surviving solely with each other.  Women have always stuck together...nurturing their babies together and nurturing the bond that allowed women and children to survive and that have come to BE.

I have had the pleasure to be supported during my difficult times of raising my little one by other mommies and I can honestly say I'm not sure how I could have gotten through it without them.  I hope that by me lending a helping hand others can say the same thing about me.  I truly believe in the healthy unit of mommies.  Support and encouragement without judgment is the best way.

Mommy Bridget

p.s. off to gain support from what I hear an amazing midwife then off to give support to a busy mommy in need

Mommy Bridget

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