Thursday, January 13, 2011

Throwing Up the Typer's Hands

Two times a day, I open up my blogger posting page and stare at the blank canvas with which to post something new for you all to read.  Lately it seems, I can't get myself to write about much of anything except for the occasional review and or giveaway of one of my wonderful, generous sponsors...either that or, although obviously important to me, just a quick bleep of information that I read about elsewhere.

And I can't figure out why.

I love to write.  I always have.  Ever since my early preteen years, I had a journal that I wrote in almost daily.  I still have them all somewhere, packed away in a box for nobody's eyes but my own to see.  I dread the day I read about what was so important to me back when I was 13 and "loved" a boy in my class or cared about the color of Guess jeans I was wearing to school that day:)

Not much of a speaker but a great listener, I've (mostly) enjoyed hearing what others have to say.  Then later on only to interpret it in my mind after the fact, making silent judgments and decisions on whether their thoughts made the cut of approval. 

I loved school...I know, I'm kind of a dork.  But give me an Algebra class and a good anthropology class on human nature and I'm glued like bees to honey.  But give me a class on economics and I still can't explain why the hell our country can have paper money and silver coins backed by our country's trillion dollar deficit.

So why can't I seem to purge out my thoughts lately on mothering and the environment and what we can do to better ourselves and our families and our community on this bleak canvas of a computer screen?  Maybe it's because my mind is only drawn to this ever growing belly beneath my chin.  Or maybe it's because my constant thoughts are of the well being of my 2 year old.  (How is he fairing?  Is he happy?  Will he EVER speak consistently?!  Will he become a math genius like his grandpa Terry or will he be musically inclined like his other Grandpa?  Will he grow one day to be a prosperous man or what will his environment hold for him in his future?  What on earth could I try to get him to eat today?!!!)  Worries worries worries...but for what?  Worrying doesn't solve anything.  It only seems to waste my mind away.

Or maybe I can't write because I'm getting sick of hearing the same stories about what to feed your children, whether you should vaccinate or not, whether you should throw out your keys and drive no more or whether or not you should home school your children.  In my pregnant mind, it's redundant.  Parenting is a pure sliding scale with which to make choices and do the best only you know how to do.  Nobody really knows what the answer is, but they sure like to act like they do!  And since my mind is so easily inclined to have all the above on my mind at any given moment in time...I choose not to write much about any of it.  At least not for now. 

Or maybe it's because I've already been writing my blog for 2 years and don't want to write about the same topics over and over and over again...

On another note but still related to my writer's block, I recently broke down and purchased a handful of new novels at Barnes and Noble.  I've been so excited about reading lately, probably because I know there will be NO time in the near future to do so with a new baby on the way.  The novels I've read so far are:

And I couldn't be more pleased with my choices.  I know the first two might seem a bit morbid, but on the contrary I found some great reminders in these beautiful books with which to be thankful for the life I've been given and for the health of the people that I love so dearly.  Reading these reminded me that all the little things we worry about as parents and are so often judged by other parents don't mean much when looking at the big picture...or when looking at reality for that matter. 

I don't care about what choices you've made and whether or not you think I should do the same as you...I"m just glad that whatever those choices were that they worked for you.  Isn't that all we should really care about?  That we are not only confident in the decisions we've made as parents but also that they are OUR decisions, and that by respecting one another's choices we are giving one another as parents the credit we all so deserve? 

Geez, I think I'm complaining now...that was not my intent here.

My intent was, first and foremost, just to write.  I mean that is why I started my blog a few years ago isn't it?  That's what they are here for.  And next, my intent was to explain why I haven't been writing much these past few months.  (And just to warn you, I'm sure I'll be writing even less as time goes on with baby coming.)  But most of all, I wanted to say that if I'm getting sick of reading about the same aspects of parenting styles...than I'm sure many of you are feeling the same way.  I hope my blog doesn't ever feel redundant to you, but wouldn't be surprised if it did.  After all, it's a blog about mothering, natural parenting and saving the environment.  Those are pretty detailed subjects if you ask me!

So I hope you enjoy the plethora of reviews and giveaways I will be throwing at you over the coming months.  I know that my favorite blog posts to read are usually about reviews of products I'd personally be interested in.  I am doing a "New Baby Event" this spring with lots of great sponsors that I'm sure you will love to hear about and enter to win one of their products.  I hope you are all doing well and enjoying the chapter in life we call parenting.  I thank you all for your continued support in making my blog what I always hoped for it to be.

Best to each and every one of you,

Mommy Bridget

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